VALIS by Philip K. Dick

Here are some things that Philip K. Dick believed (or said that he believed) had happened to him:
*In 1974 a pink light flashed down into his eyes, imparting information from a supreme intelligence.
*The pink light told him that his son had a life-threatening medical condition. When he convinced the son's doctor to investigate, the information proved to be true, and his son's life was saved.
*He later spoke in what proved to be koine Greek, a language he had never learned.
*He could see 1st century A.D. Rome superimposed on modern California, and became convinced that time had stopped and that the modern world was not reality.
*He felt that he was also a man named Thomas, living in 1st century Rome.
*He thought that Richard Nixon was, in reality, a Roman emperor, and his downfall was brought about by the ruling intelligence with the pink light.
*For the last eight years of his life, he wrote an 8,000-page exegesis (explanation) of what he thought his visions meant, drawing on information from philosophers, ancient religious beliefs, and the Bible.

VALIS is a fictionalized autobiographical account of his quest to find the answers. In the opening pages, speaking as Phlip K. Dick, he says of the main character, Horselover Fat, "I am Horselover Fat, and I am writing this in the third person to gain much-needed objectivity." He then inserts himself into the story, as Horselover Fat's best friend. For the remainder of the novel, then, Dick essentially argues with himself about whether or not the occult experiences actually occurred or whether they were only products of a confused and sick mind. Many strange events occur which could support either viewpoint. The two parts of Dick come together briefly toward the end, when both parts believe in the visions, but then he splits apart again.

Either Dick went to great lengths to perpetuate a myth about himself and his experiences (doubtful), or he was mentally ill, desperately trying to distinguish reality from delusion. Some may even believe that he had a true vision of reality, denied to most of us.

Whatever the case, Dick certainly had done much reading to explain his illuminations. After about 30 pages I realized I did not have the background knowledge to understand his references, so I spent a couple of hours on the internet looking things up. (If "a little knowledge is a dangerous thing," I am a very dangerous person, because I have a little knowledge about a lot.) Here are some of the things I had to look up: gnosticism, Zoroaster, Rosicrucians, the Dogan people, St. Sophia, and Ikhnaton. I could have looked up more, but there is just so much effort I am willing to spend on a 226-page "science fiction" book.

This book's schizophrenic narration is mind-unsettling. It is certainly interesting and led me to know a little about a lot of subjects I didn't know about before. Ultimately, it just seemed to me to be a very sad look into an intelligent, seriously damaged mind.